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  • Mom: mama?
  • Baby: mitochondria. it is the powerhouse of the cell

107,681 notes - reblog

leinabby808:

anus:

the scary thing about dating is that you are either going to marry that person or break up

deep thoughts from an anus

1,569,070 notes - reblog

tomatogami:

tomatogami:

im gonna need to see ur license and regist-  oh gosh mr washington i apologize have a nice day sir

i was high as fuck last night
edwardspoonhands:

spirantization:

2-shane-s:

birdsofafeathercolchester:

Little knitted pigeon enjoying come crisps on the pavement…

I thought that only the bag of chips was knitted so I was like lmaoo fucking idiot bird got owned then I saw that the bird was knitted as well then I realized I was the fucking idiot bird getting owned

i thought this bird was snacking on the fault in our stars

I was like “TFIOS!” then “FAKE CHIPS! STUPID PIGEON” then I read…

mavenfandom:

eggsus:

officialpollen:

celebrities that get more shit than they should:

  • nicki minaj
  • ke$ha
  • miley cyrus
  • lorde
  • lindsay lohan
  • taylor swift

celebrities that don’t get enough shit:

  • justin bieber
  • nash grier
  • justin bieber

notice how the first list is all women leading the industry. notice how the second list is two teenage boys who think they run shit but they’re hurting people.

you forgot robin thicke

223,005 notes - reblog

jeremymckinnonsbuttblog:

lorassed:

why the fuck does vagina=weak and dick=strong
have u ever kicked someone in the dick? they fall to the floor and cry
kick someone in the vagina and i can guarantee u they’ll just punch u in the face
vagina not weak
vagina strong

this is the most inspiring post on this website

280,950 notes - reblog

404pogohammer:

jellybabiesandjammiedodgers:

thelovelylifeofareader:

thebookishdragon:

booktown:

randomhouse:

seasighing:

Life tip: bring a book with you everywhere you go

Life pro tip: bring two, in case you finish the first one.

Bigger life pro tip: Bring a kobo/kindle with you everywhere so you have an entire library with you at all times. 

Ultimate life pro tip: live in a library and never ever leave. 

Supreme life tip: Become a library

image

NONONONONO DO NOT BECOME A LIBRARY

165,809 notes - reblog

worldpeaces:

when people who aren’t even in your convo interrupt you

image

171,825 notes - reblog